This story happened a while ago, but I have to record it for posterity.

The Setting: My brother's car, on our way to my uncle's house for the 4th of July.

The Players: Me, my brother and his family. My mom comes into play later.

The Plot: As we drive along I-90, the conversation turns to body piercings (as any good conversation should). In passing, my brother mentions my mother's belly-button ring. Belly-button ring?! My mom? We pick up the dialogue here...

ME No way. She doesn't have a belly-button ring. My mom tells me EVERYTHING, and she definitely would have told me about getting a belly-button ring.

BROTHER She sure did! She did it a few years ago, with some of her friends from Minneapolis. She wouldn't show it to anybody, though, because she said it was still red and puffy.

ME I'm sorry. I just can't believe it because we don't really keep secrets from each other. Plus, if she told you, why wouldn't she have told me?

BROTHER Whatever.

The Plot Thickens: So we arrive at my uncles house and find that my parents have already arrived. I manage to corner my mother away from the rest of our crew.

ME MOM! I'm so mad at you! [said with a grin and a playful jab of the elbow] You never told me about your piercing!

MA Piercing?

ME Um, yeah. Your piercing. Randy just told me about it in the car.

MA [gives me puzzled look]

ME You know... your belly-button ring?

MA [has sudden moment of realization and starts to laugh] OHHH, my BELLY-BUTTON ring. You see, that was actually just a cover story that I told them.

ME [adopts MA's puzzled look] Huh?

MA I did get a piercing a few years ago, but... well... let's just say that it was a little lower than my belly-button...

TABLEAU--I with a horrified look upon my face, my mother giggling